Black Days

It seems like we are at the world’s end. What’s left of the day hangs over the horizon, obscured in cloud cover. Here we are in the dead of winter, missing the sunlight. Skin pale, vitamin D deficient, and just fudging depressed while the trees and vegetation slumber beneath a blanket of fresh snow that almost seems to be perpetually falling, albeit the pace varies.

Dark and gloomy, like the world itself is dipped in chrome. A mixture of snow and rain falls over the rusted-out relic that is Electric City. Rogues’ Gallery, Jeremy The Wicked and Superunknown stand together, roughly thirty miles to the northeast of Electric City in the abandoned sanitarium, Saratoga County Homestead. Rusty nails and debris decorate the scene the Duos Champions occupy. Dark and stormy, Superunknown smirks as he adjusts the belt resting on his shoulder.

Superunknown: This is the part of the story where the slump starts, right? JTW and I just caught a lucky break and we rode to the championships at Winter Wrestleland? Sure, maybe you can claim that had I not smashed that chair over Ava Arthur’s chair, JTW wouldn’t have beaten Alessia Angelo and we wouldn't have secured the shot at the Duos Championships? Then we just caught Lights Out on an off night? It happens. Any given Friday or so the saying goes. At least, that’s the scenario that some of you are hoping is true. It’s the S.E.X. Cup season. Time for everyone and their Mother to show up as a team. J. Mont and Peter Vaughn? For those of you spending your days under a rock, they are former American and International Champions respectively… How can we ever hope to compete with that kind of starpower? Not to mention, former Duos Champions Never/More and the Malvados. It seems we’ve got our work cut out for us.

Jeremy The Wicked smiles at Superunknown’s words.

JTW: You can say that again…

Superunknown: I’m not going to say anything again though.

JTW shakes his head.

JTW: It’s a figure of speech, figured you would at least know that, but guess you’re spending too much time in your crystal starship and you forgot how we talk back here on Earth . Anyway… yeah, we owe the Malvados one. It’s time to get mucho even with those two after what they pulled in our Tequila Deathmatch with them. I still can't even stand the smell of Tequila.

Superunknown: Now, you may be wondering what the hell the two of us are doing in an abandoned sanitarium. Well, we didn't come here to try and be scary, we didn't come here to look like mucho evil dudes or anything of that sort, we came here tonight to send a message to our opponents, the Show Stealerz at Friday Night Fury.

JTW steps forward and holds his arms out to his sides.

JTW: Look around you, what do you see? A whole lot of nothing. This building hasn't been maintained in a few decades. It's been standing as is for longer than I've been alive. We don't need to surround ourselves with glitz and glamor. Rogues’ Gallery does not have much need for fancy things. You won't find us in five star hotels, you won't ever see us sipping expensive champagne or eating caviar. We aren't exactly simple men, but we are men of simple tastes. Beer, chicken wings, hard rock, and kicking ass are about the only things we need to be happy.

JTW shrugs.

JTW: It’s that simple.

Superunknown chimes in.

Superunknown: Despite that when it comes to this business, when it comes to this sport, when it comes down to being inside of that ring. Despite our humble lifestyles, we won't settle for just being Duos Champions. We won't settle for just one big PPV win before we give up these belts. We won't even settle for merely a long reign of to get to the finals and win in the S.E.X. cup. We want all of it and we are coming for it all.

JTW: Now, we don't know much about the Show Stealerz other than what their bios tell us, beyond that though, they are a total mystery. We kind of like that though, really ups the challenge factor. And if we're going to have it all, I say, bring it on. I say no challenge is too great. I say, let's evolve and let the chips fall where they may.

JTW smirks slyly, having just snuck in a Fight Club quote.

Superunknown: We stepped up to the plate when he swung above our paygrade and took on Lights Out and we knocked it out of the park like the pros that we are. I think it's time we do that again with the S.E.X. Cup, it's time to show the world what Rogues’ Gallery is made of. It’s time to prove to the rest of you that we are here to stay.

JTW looks at his partner.

JTW: You think that just about covers it?

Superunknown thinks for a moment and then nods.

Superunknown: I think so. I think we said all there is to say.

They both cross their arms over their chests as the light in the room dims to total darkness.

Later that night…

High above the Fortress of Solitude, above even the clouds, Superunknown hovers in his crystal starship. His eyes closed, he is in deep meditation. Duncan is fast asleep at home.

Elsewhere, JTW is awake and roaming the wilderness. He is alone, at least he would appear to be from the outside. The Shadow is with him. Snowflakes dance around him as he makes his way down a path nearly hidden in the darkness.

The Shadow is hungry and angry. He hungers for battle, after all, it has been nearly a month since Jeremy The Wicked and Rogues’ Gallery has stepped into the ring.

Shadow: Why are you wandering in the dark?! You idiot?! I am starving for battle! Get me an exhibition match.

JTW shakes his head no.

JTW: No can do, bucko. Gotta stay fresh for the S.E.X. Cup in a few days.

Shadow: Fine… Well, at least tell me why we are out here in the freezing cold.

The wind howls as the snow begins to drift.

JTW: You don't already know? Aren't you in my head, after all?

Shadow: Don't be coy with me, boy.

JTW: Aunt Ava says this kind of weather keeps our senses sharp and our mind focused.

Shadow: The witch would know, wouldn't she?

JTW: Come on, man! Please don't insult my family like that.

Shadow:  I'm not insulting anyone. Ava calls herself a witch and besides, you're not blood related.

JTW: Yeah, well… that's kind of irrelevant when you're adopted, isn't it? I'm not related to anyone in my family.

Shadow: Don't sugarcoat it, you're a bastard. You were left alone when your crazy ass Mom got committed and the Jupiter’s saved your ass from the foster care system. You don't have a family, you have a charity.

JTW: Well, yeah.. That’s only somewhat true. The Jupiters are my family! But why are you being such a dick right now?

Shadow: I told you, I'm bored and I'm jonesing for violence.

JTW: Not sure what else to tell you, you're going to have to wait until Friday. I wish I could help you, but I don't know how.

Shadow: I've got something to show you.

Suddenly the Shadow appears on the trail in front of JTW, leering at him in the dark.


Shadow: Follow me, please...

The Shadow turns and takes the path least taken. JTW follows closely behind.

JTW: Where are we going?

Shadow:  Just be patient.You’ll see…

Back in the crystal starship, Superunknown opens his eyes. He rises to his feet and walks over to a group of monitors displaying several graphs which seem to indicate any strange activity happening in the state of New York. These charts are usually quiet, but today a large red dot blinks over the geo-location of Electric City.

Superunknown: Computer, bring up any details you have on the anomaly.

Computer: Certainly, the anomaly appears to be a time disturbance of some kind. Fairly large, covering approximately three acres of uninhabited land to the north east of Electric City town hall. Downloading coordinates to your GPS.

Superunknown: Thank you, computer.

Duncan McKnown sits up in bed. He gets up, and pulls his Superunknown gear on before he heads down stairs and fires up his motorcycle and heads out of town toward the coordinates his computer provided.

As JTW follows the Shadow, the Shadow turns around and motions for JTW to keep quiet. Just beyond the bend JTW can make out a strange, pulsating glow filling the forest.

JTW: What the fudge is that? No, no, no… After getting kidnapped by a psycho cyborg before Winter Wrestleland, I've learned my lesson. I'm not going one step further.

Shadow: Don't be such a coward.

JTW: Why do I listen to you?

Shadow: Because I’m fun and without me you’re too much of a pussy.

JTW shrugs.

JTW: I resent that, but I guess... Eh… why the hell not see what this thing is?

He heads down the trail and the glow gets brighter as he approaches what looks like a giant soap bubble, glowing and pulsating in the forest. JTW studies it bubble in amazement.

Shadow: You should touch it.

JTW: No way! I have no idea what this weird thing even is.

Shadow: C’mon… do it!

JTW: Fudge man, do I have to?

Shadow: You know you want to.

JTW shrugs. He reaches out and touches the surface of the bubble. Instantaneously he is pulled into it along with the Shadow. JTW closes his eyes as he feels himself pulled forward. He opens his eyes and finds that he’s backstage at the FedEx Forum in Memphis. JTW sees himself standing in front of him. Normally this would be shocking, but honestly, at this point is anything shocking?

JTW 2: Hello.

JTW: Wait… what? Who are you?!

JTW 2: I’m you dude! From the Future. I’m from January 19th, 2024 dude! We did it, dude! Rogues’ Gallery beat the Show Stealerz, dude! Just like y’all said you would.

Jeremy’s eyes narrow.

JTW: Wait… if you're me... why are you talking like that?

JTW 2: To distract you, dude!

JTW looks at his double, puzzled.

JTW: Why would you want to distract me?

JTW 2: So we could do this!

Superunknown’s evil clone runs up and tosses a sack over JTW’s head before he grabs him and shoves him into a nearby utility closet. He slams the door shut and breaks the handle off, trapping JTW in the closet.

Back on the trail, Superunknown draws in closely now. He has almost located the time disruption and can see the same pulsating glow JTW saw. As Superuknown approaches he presses down on his watch and pings his computer back on the crystal starship.

Superunknown: Computer, run diagnostics.

Computer: Certainly! I’m processing that request right now. Results are populating.

After a few moments the computer chirps back.

Computer: This appears to be a major time disturbance, it is roughly an ⅛ of a mile in diameter.My analysis indicates a possible origin, the year 2085. Proceed with caution.

Superunknown: How long has it been here?

Computer: The anomaly has been in this area approximately 2 hours according to my calculations, sir.

Superunknown: Thank you. Good work computer.

Superunknown closes his eyes and touches the outer membrane of the bubble, he is pulled within it and fast forwards in time. When he finally opens his eyes, he is standing in a large penthouse in a rather tall building, overlooking an extremely futuristic city. 


The Technocrat turns and greets him with cold, mechanical face. His eyes appear to be human, but it's as if all of the humanity has been stripped out.

Technocrat: Hello, Duncan… Zorry, I should zay, Zuperunknown. I have been expecting you. Please, have a zeat.

Superunknown looks down at the chair and then back to the Technocrat.

Superunknown: No thanks. I'm good with standing here.

Technocrat: Fine, zuit yourself zen. I was merely being polite, your comfort is of no material concern to me anyway.

The Technocrat gazes out the window. He doesn't even divert his gaze to talk to Superunknown.

Technocrat: I have been trying to get my hands on you and your partner for a zome time now. Ever zince you and your little dog, I mean, Duos partner, Jeremy, took out my asset, Raymond_II.exe.

Superunknown: That poor, psychotic freak was an asset? YOUR ASSET? And YOU SENT AFTER US?!

Superunknown cracks his knuckles and rolls his neck angrily. Angry bottles up inside him as he readies to pounce on the Technocrat at a moment's notice if he has to.

The Technocrat smirks.

Technocrat: Sadly no, Raymond, the poor dying man was merely infected with zee program I sent back in time to seek you and Jeremy Zee Wicked out. Zee freak you speak of was merely an accident. The unfortunate result of an experiment gone awry.

Superunknown: Why were you seeking us out then?

Technocrat: Look around you. Zis world is a world of order. Perfect technological order. Human nature is completely tamed. It is beautiful. No crime, no political strife, none of zee trappings of history, none of zee messes that come along with freedom and liberty. Everything tracked, collated, and analyzed by advanced technology you won’t live to see. We don’t believe in zilly zuperstitions like God or spirit. Zat has been stamped out. Zee masses have been rehabilitated. Zey no longer require zee opium of fairy tales. Science is truly zee master now. We have arrived here at zee end of history, zanks to advances in technology and zee right philosophies to govern life … yet, uprisings do crop up from time-to-time. Errant code within your nature as humans, I guess. Some do rebel and we put zose rebellions down quickly, yet, zey all seem to share one odd trait. When doing an analysis, two data points consistently remain the same.

The Technocrat clears his throat.

Technocrat: You and Jeremy Zee Wicked as zose data points, zee Rogues’ Gallery…

His face sours with disgust at even uttering that name, well, the human bits anyway. You can tell it causes him some discomfort.

Technocrat: It seems you and Jeremy's freewheeling nature really capture zee people's imagination time and time again and despite my most aggressive attempts, we can't keep your memory or footage of your team in action during zee 2024 TPW S.E.X. Cup from springing up and causing trouble. So I created evil clones of you and Jeremy, after I spring my trap and secure your capture, zey will replace you in the tournament and instead of your morally gray, they are evil to zee core.

Zey will advance in zee tournament, disbanding opponent after opponent in brutal fashion. Zee people who would have come to regard you like heroes, will instead see you as evil oppressors. Your replacements will do some truly heinous and villainous things. Zey will, instead of stoking inspiration and igniting passion in zee human spirit, will crush it.

Children will cry when zey here your music. Hearts will break. It will be truly marvelous and I look forward to reading about it in zee history books.

Superunknown scoffs at the absurdity of the notion. He shakes his head from side-to-side.

Superunknown: Unbelievable! You are truly belligerent in your arrogance! What makes you think we will fall for whatever trap you set for us and let some evil clones replace us?

The Technocrat laughs.

Technocrat: You both already have. Jeremy was captured earlier and you are about to be neutralized right now.

Superunknown looks at the Techocrat incredulously before the Technocrat fiddles with his watch and a trap door opens up below where Superunknown is standing. Superunknown falls down a long chute, landing in some kind of holding cell. He pounds on the walls and the door, which is sealed shut. A small screen is mounted above a small cot, toilet, and sink.

The screen hums to life and the Technocrat’s face appears on it.

Technocrat: I will afford you zee luxury of watching zee destruction at the hands of my assets, your “counterparts” as they run through zee S.E.X. Cup, destroying zeir opponents in the cruelest of fashions.

MUHAHAHAHAHA!

Superunknown slams his fist into the screen, cracking the face of it. He is trapped here, in some far away future. Forced to watch as his legacy is perverted and destroyed by some megalomaniac.

Back in the forest, in the present, Superunknown and JTW's evil clones step out of the time disruption bubble. The bubble bursts and closes behind them. They look to one another.

JTW 2: Superunknown…

Superunknown 2: Jeremy The Wicked…

JTW 2: No one has any idea what's in store for them. Certainly not the Show Stealerz. I'm about to show them just how wicked I really am. What do you say we give TPW a taste of true villainy?

Superunknown 2 laughs softly.

Superunknown 2: Why stop at just a taste? I hope the Show Stealerz are ready… ‘cause we're coming to not just win, we're coming to take it all from them. We're coming to break their spirit. Rogues’ Gallery is coming to break everyone's spirit and show everyone in that locker room what villains we really are. Time for a little super-violence at the hands of Superunknown! It is time for the takeover to begin!

The evil Rogues’ Gallery clones cross their arms over their chest as they stand looking out at the freshly snow covered, waiting for them to come along and conquer it.